🚨🦄💜 SCOTCH PLAINS, NJ: THE FUN POLICE HAVE BEEN OVERTHROWN BY A GANG OF DANCING CRAYONS. 💜🦄🚨
We tried to stop them. We failed. They have demands.
Demand #1: A Behavior Technician / ABA Para.
Demand #2: Snacks. (We’re negotiating.) 🍪
Demand #3: That someone, anyone, please celebrate a completed puzzle like it’s the moon landing. 🌙🧩
That someone is YOU. 👀 The crayons have already chosen. It’s out of our hands.
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💸 THE MONEY PART (PLEASE SIT DOWN) 💸
$22-$30 AN HOUR!!!
Your wallet is shaking. 😭
Your bank account just sat up in bed. 😳
Your landlord is suddenly being very nice to you. 🤝
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🕵️ THE CLASSIFIED DETAILS:
📍 Location: Scotch Plains, NJ
💜 Position: Behavior Technician / ABA Para
⏰ Hours: After-school sessions
🎯 Mission: One-on-one with an awesome kid
🌈 Side effects: Making a REAL difference
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⚠️ OFFICIAL HEALTH WARNING ⚠️
This job may cause:
😁 Excessive smiling
💃 Spontaneous happy dances
🎉 Screaming “AMAZING JOB!!!” at a block tower
🎲 Taking board games WAY too seriously
🦖 Sudden urge to roar for no reason
Side effects are permanent. No refunds. 😂
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🎪 WHY YOU’LL LOVE IT
✨ Zero cubicles. Zero spreadsheets. Zero sad desk lunches.
🧸 Help a child learn, grow, and build awesome new skills
💜 Do something that actually matters
🏆 Celebrate every tiny win like it’s breaking news
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🧐 ARE YOU OUR PERSON?
🌟 Love kids? AMAZING.
🌟 Patient, dependable, and willing to learn? WE ADORE YOU.
🌟 Have ABA experience or an RBT certification? BONUS POINTS. CONFETTI CANNON. 🎊
🌟 Can make a ridiculous noise on command? You’re basically hired. 🤪
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⏳ WE’RE FILLING THIS SPOT ASAP!
(Not panic mode. Not chaos mode. Just enthusiastic mode.) 💪💜
📣 DON’T JUST SCROLL PAST YOUR NEXT FAVORITE JOB. The crayons are watching. 👁️🖍️
📩 MESSAGE ME TODAY and let’s see if you’re the missing piece of our puzzle! 🧩
💜 SCOTCH PLAINS, LET’S FIND OUR PERSON! 💜
P.S. If you read this whole thing, you’ve already passed the first interview. Congrats. 🏅😂